Rio 2016: Quarterfinal Showdown set for Wednesday in Men’s Basketball

There’s a global confrontation brewing in Brazil at the moment. It’s true. Forgive my overstatement, but peep this: There are a mere eight teams left in the Men’s Basketball tournament for the Olympics. It’s the Quarterfinals. And it’s all going down on Wednesday. Gird your loins, let’s run through the day’s schedule.

First, at 10am (wait, really?), our man Jonas Valanciunas leads Lithuania into a match against the ruffians from down under on team Australia. This is significant for a couple of reasons. One, the Aussies have been playing some inspired ball as of late, losing only to the USA (in a close game no less!). Two, are you ready for Jonas vs. Aron Baynes Round 328? These two do not like each other. Three, will we see a dominant Jonas game? It’s about to get turnt (even at freakin’ 10 in the gotdamn morning). Let’s watch.

Then, at 1:30pm (a much more reasonable time) there’s the throw down between noted European powers France and Spain. These two teams have, uh, a bit of a history...

But wait there’s more! We follow that up with the roll-out of Team USA’s Less-Than-Juggernaut against the Dying-of-the-Light Golden Aged Argentina at 5:45pm. There are a bunch of story lines here, too. We can all get together and worry about Kyle Lowry’s weight. (See Exhibit A below.)

We can put our heads together and wonder if DeMar DeRozan is the right kind of player for international basketball. (See any boxscore.) We can wonder if Luis Scola, veteran lion of the sport, has a few more tricks up his sleeve. (See Scola’s wily smile.) We can celebrate Manu. (See any game the dude has played in.) There’s just a lot going on.

And finally, with absolutely no historical animus whatsoever, Croatia and Serbia are going to play at 9:15pm. Cool. Cool cool cool.

Good luck everyone.