Chronic Rosterbation

by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:13 PM EST

This is the place where guys can come, unashamed of their primal urge to rosterbate, and share their experiences with other sympathetic chronic rosterbators. If you have a dirty little trade proposal you found on the internet while the wife was asleep, share it here where people understand you in ways your wife just never will.

I am well known on this site as a public rosterbator and I am not ashamed.

I find pleasure in the enticing thoughts of a team that penetrates deep into the playoffs...

I know that I will never meet these objects of my trade desires and that by-and-large the general public doesn't want to know about my private transactions.

I've nearly filled a wastebasket with papers covered with the results of my rosterbation.

But I am not ashamed.

I will continue on, multiple times a day sometimes, while I fantasize about a fivesome that I know will never happen.

I will share with you now some of my recent sessions and encourage you to do the same...

Update: Trade Deadline is passed, what to do now...

This would be my rotation to finish out the season:

Starters

8 Jose Calderon G 6-3 210

10 DeMar DeRozan G 6-7 220

0 James Johnson SF 6-9 220

32 Ed Davis PF 6-10 225

7 Andrea Bargnani C-PF 7-0 250

Bench (in order of entering the game, not necessarily minutes usage)

15 Amir Johnson PF 6-9 210

24 Sonny Weems SF 6-6 203

32 Jerryd Bayless G 6-3 200

00 Alexis Ajinca C 7-2 248

28 Leandro Barbosa G 6-3 202

14 Julian Wright SF 6-8 225

09 Joey Dorsey PF-C 6-8 268

30 Reggie Evans PF 6-8 245

50 Solomon Alabi C 7-1 251

Injured

11 Linas Kleiza SF 6-8 245

Starters Strategy:

Jose is our number one PG, no question he is required for heavy minutes...

Demar is our future All Star at the 2...

Johnson is a good all around player with a defense first mindset, best option to start at SF until we draft Terrence Jones, Harrison Barnes or Derrick Williams...

Ed Davis continues to add to the defensive balance this starting lineup needs...

Bargnani (love it or hate it) will start as long as he is a Raptor...

Substitutions:

1. Whichever of Davis or Bargnani is having the worse start, Amir replaces... If he comes in for a struggling Bargnani I also substitute Weems for James Johnson to maintain scoring...

2. When Jose needs a rest I bring in Bayless...

3. When Demar needs a rest I move Sonny to the 2 and bring James Johnson back into the SF spot...

*When Bayless is at the helm I would like to run a lineup of DeMar or Sonny at the 2 (whichever is in at the time), James Johnson at SF, Ed Davis at the 4 and Ajinca at C... Rationale-Bayless and DeRozan/Weems can attack, while the other three crash HEAVY on the boards...

I would sprinkle in minor minutes for Barbosa if he doesn't go for the surgery, and very minor minutes for Wright, Dorsey and Evans until all these guys are traded...

Interesting side note: In numerous games now I've watched how well Jose and Amir work together, it's beautiful, but also that Bayless has been quite willing to look for Davis and Ajinca when given the opportunity...

Anyways... that's my bit of coaching for the day...

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Comments

Gerald Wallace

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:14 PM EST reply actions

Perkins / Daniels

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:22 PM EST reply actions

Dudley / Chandler and Felton

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:41 PM EST reply actions

Calderon / Felton
Derozan / Barbosa
Chandler / Dudley
Johnson / Davis
Bargnani / Ajinca

with Weems / Evans / Alabi

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:44 PM EST up reply actions

West / Green

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Jan 24, 2011 5:58 PM EST reply actions

+1...I won't be taking part in this

But this is hilarious.

by HDave on Jan 24, 2011 6:58 PM EST reply actions

I just came

because the title is amazing!

by Not so Friendly Stranger on Jan 24, 2011 9:55 PM EST reply actions

Nene

‎Formerly Caps Canadian Connection.

by Amacaps on Jan 24, 2011 10:27 PM EST reply actions

Nene

‎Formerly Caps Canadian Connection.

by Amacaps on Jan 24, 2011 10:30 PM EST up reply actions

FUck.

http://games.espn.go.com/nba/tradeMachine

‎Formerly Caps Canadian Connection.

by Amacaps on Jan 24, 2011 10:31 PM EST up reply actions

K. THis is sickening. NENE

http://games.espn.go.com/nba/tradeMachine?tradeId=4urp2ea

‎Formerly Caps Canadian Connection.

by Amacaps on Jan 24, 2011 10:31 PM EST up reply actions

LOL... sticky keyboard?

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 12:39 AM EST up reply actions

Rush / Foster

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 10:18 AM EST reply actions

Rip Hamilton

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 10:19 AM EST reply actions

My favourite combination up there is...

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 10:25 AM EST reply actions

My personal favourite combination is...

Gerald Wallace and Perkins / Daniels and Martin

New Roster

Jose Calderon / Jerryd Bayless
Demar Derozan / Kevin Martin / Marquis Daniels
Gerald Wallace / Julian Wright
Amir Johnson / Ed Davis
Sam Perkins / Andrea Bargnani / Alexis Ajinca

Done…

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 10:30 AM EST reply actions

And then draft a top PG or SF...

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by Mikthaniel on Jan 25, 2011 10:33 AM EST up reply actions

Current State of the Raptor Roster

Keep these guys:

Calderon, Bayless, DeRozan, Wright, Davis, Johnson, Dorsey, Ajinca

Trade these guys:

Barbosa, Kleiza, Evans, Dorsey, Bargnani

Cut these guys (trade if you can but I don’t think they’re wanted, maybe for late picks?):

Weems, Alabi

I would seriously run the Keep lineup on their own for a few games just as an experiment…

Start Calderon, DeRozan, Wright, Johnson, Davis
Sub in Bayless, Trey Johnson (renew his 10 day), Dorsey and Ajinca

I know it lacks firepower on offense, but I bet my ass it hustles on Defense…

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Feb 1, 2011 3:07 PM EST reply actions

Whoops, Dorsey's name shouldn't have made it's way into that trade list...

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by Mikthaniel on Feb 1, 2011 3:09 PM EST up reply actions

Then when we draft Terrence Jones we have some more scoring...

PLUS now add whoever we got in return for Barbosa, Evans, Kleiza, and Bargnani…

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by Mikthaniel on Feb 1, 2011 3:10 PM EST up reply actions

Cut Alabi and Weems?

Why? What’s the point? Neither of them are getting paid a lot of money.

Alabi is a project so just let him develop this year. He’s not costing much money so why not just keep him? He might actually develop into a useful piece. If not, just release him at the end of the year or in camp next year.

Same questions for Weems. He might develop into something and he’s now under the gun to do so. If not, you’d still have to replace him and you are not likely to find a replacement that is any better. He’s a free agent at the end of the year so just ride it out.

by siggian on Feb 2, 2011 10:47 AM EST up reply actions

I just wouldn't waste minutes on somebody who isn't in the plans for the future and has no trade value...

So if you need a roster spot or two, cut them, if not, letting them be practice bodies until the end of the year is fine… but for god sakes don’t play them and take minutes from the likes of Davis…

I realize that Sonny helps for now because we don’t have the extra bodies at the 2 and 3 but as soon as we can make a trade to get a real player at the SF he is a waste of minutes…

KDFREATPED

by Mikthaniel on Feb 2, 2011 6:33 PM EST up reply actions